Fun and Frivolous Results

Last Saturday morning, as the boys were getting breakfast fare out, I told them that they needed to serve cake first. Their reactions were quite different from what I expected. Ryan's eyes opened wide in disbelief. Cam paused for the brief moment and then wrapped his arms around me and said, "I love you, Mom." Nick observed his brothers in silence and moved the cake to the table.

I expected the boys to be surprised; I also expected some confusion or hesitation. Usually, my kids follow a black and white mode. The schedule. They don't vary much. I really thought I'd cause a commotion. Nope. They rode the strange tide as if they were used to unpredictable situations.

Breakfast started off with cake followed by fruit, muffins, and turkey. Lunch was left overs. They had already guessed that eggs would be a part of dinner. Of course, they wanted another round of dessert.

So my teens with autism are showing flexibility and adaptability!

Fun and Frivolous

I made a cake last Sunday, just for the fun of it. No birthday. No special occasion.

Confusion.

The boys didn't know what to say. They looked perplexed and confused. They didn't understand that it was ok to make a cake.

That made me think about how much we do because there is a reason. For kids with autism, a schedule is a dictate for life. NOTHING happens unless there is a reason. Life is black and white. Gray is cause for confusion. While a schedule can make life easier, it can make life bland. I want my sons to be able to enjoy life, not just "have to do" things.

During this Advent Season, this is one lesson I will teach. Spontaneity. It's ok to do things without planning. Autistic kids have a difficult time if things are not predictable, but life doesn't happen always according to a plan (does it ever?). Nonetheless, life can still be enjoyed.

My plan for tomorrow is to have our meals backwards. Dessert for breakfast. I think that will be a pleasant surprise. It might totally throw their world upside down. However, I don't think they will argue. Much. They might even paraphrase Bill Cosby about chocolate cake for breakfast--it has eggs, milk, wheat--a great breakfast! We'll end with eggs for dinner.

I never knew baking a cake would cause such a stir!

Cheering For A Normal Conversation!

"Our team scored 24, and their team earned 41."

Nick was not happy that his high school football team lost in the playoffs. Nick was discussing the game with his grandpa last weekend. I was right next to my dad, so I listened with interest. Nick had started the conversation which intrigued me. It's always an adventure when he talks.

I immediately noticed the sentence structure and word choice. Usually, Nick uses very simple sentences and repeated words. This time he had used different verbs and correct tense. WOW. He also used a compound sentence. Yippee. His speech continued to show incredible progress since his chelation over the summer.

Ok. So most people would be bored with the grammar of my son's speech, but this is a kid with autism whose speech is extremely limited. He can be difficult to understand. The other person must exercise patience to allow Nick the processing time needed between his sentences. Most of the time he uses related words vs the correct phrase.

For example, most people would not dare to ask a person, "How many pounds are you?" The message is received, but it's not normal to ask using those words. The question, "How much do you weigh?" would be normal question to not ask. Nick was using correct terms, not related terms. The correct tenses and structure are cause for applause too. Nick was easy to understand. THAT IS A FIRST. (Whether that question should be asked at all is another obstacle to autism--knowing when not to ask certain questions.)

Nick finished the five minute conversation by saying that he'll cheer for his football team next year. He is not going to give up on his team. Likewise, I'll continue to root for Nick's continued speech improvements. GO, NICK!

Photo credit: ElvertBarnes