Thank You For Your Consideration

My Nick

So, the other day I asked the boys if they wanted to come with me to run a few errands.  I was going to end with dinner out, but I didn't tell them.  I was curious if they'd be willing to help me out.

The responses I received were mostly typical.  Ryan and Cameron chimed in unison, "NO!"

Nick, however, responded with a surprising response, "I thank you for your consideration, but no thank you."

My mouth dropped.  I was stunned.  That is the most Nick has put together without hesitation and rehearsal.  Not only that, but how courteous.  How polite.  I asked him if he had heard that somewhere.  He shrugged his shoulders.  I am not convinced, but I will let that be his secret!

I smiled.  AND I thanked him.

I ended up doing my errands alone, but everywhere I went, I had a smile!  My boys with autism CAN answer with more than a one word answer spontaneously.

Dinner out would wait for another day.

Realizing My Boys Have Conquered Their Sensory Issues

Yesterday Cameron and I cleaned out the "sensory section" in our pantry.  I purchased these items years ago when my boys had several sensory issues. I put everything on my kitchen counter.  To my shock, the entire counter was covered with various things:  feathers, pipe cleaners, clothes pins, felt cloth, yarn, beads, corks, wood, and many other things.  I probably could have opened a small craft store!

As I looked at each object, I remembered why I purchased it.  Most items had different textures.  Some items helped build dexterity and strength.  Others helped with fine motor coordination.  My memories were bittersweet, going back at least ten years...

Although my youngest three have autism, all four of my younger boys had sensory issues. Their issues varied:

Stuart couldn't stand the feel of grass under his feet.  When we went for a walk, he shrieked when sprinkler systems went on.  We'd have to cross the street to avoid the sprinklers.

Ryan hated to be hugged; he didn't like to be touched at all.  He refused to wear jeans because the material was too rough.  Sounds were painful.

Nicholas couldn't tolerate anything on his arms, legs, and feet.  When the weather was cold, getting him to wear appropriate long pants, long sleeve shirts, and shoes were next to impossible.  Light bothered him as well.

Cameron loved to bang his head against a concrete or tile floor.  Bang, bang, bang...

None of them liked dirt or shaving cream on their hands.  Sand was a no-go, making a trip to the park or beach futile.

I remembered the physical therapists and occupational therapists used these items in front of me to help my boys, quite often with no or minimal success.  We tried week after week.  Slowly my boys got used to some textures.  Others took years.  So I put them away.

Until yesterday.

Now my boys are too old for these things, and they have no interest.  They also don't need them.  THAT IS A HAPPY THOUGHT.  The sad thought is that I missed out so many other things; things that I hoped to make with them.  Oh well.

Although these items represented a small fortune, I didn't regret spending the money.  Everything contributed in a small way to their current status of today.  Today my boys can go anywhere with peers, and function quite well.

So Cameron and I gave all of these items to a nearby family.  It was good to see the smiles are the youngsters' faces.  They saw all the potential projects they could make.  Life is good!

Ryan First Driving Lesson: Thrilling and Terrifying

Ryan's first driving lesson with Gpa

For two years Ryan has not wanted to drive.  "I don't want the responsibility."

I couldn't understand Ryan's decision.  When I was 16, I couldn't wait to drive.  I was in line at 8 am to take my driver's test on my birthday.   Within that hour, I had my license in hand and ready for freedom and independence, or a semblance thereof!

Back to Ryan. For two years, Mike and I would push for him to take the test to get his permit; then we'd relent.  We weren't sure if it was lack of confidence, procrastination, or fear that kept Ryan from pursuing this opportunity.  Ryan wanted independence, but not enough to get his permit.

Well, Ryan's grandparents took on the task this summer of working with Ryan to get his permit.  At this point, he needed a gentle push, and then we'd see what happened.  For a month, Ryan studied the driving handbook and was tested.  The first try was unsuccessful.  The second try was.  Yea.

Ryan had his first driving lesson with Grandpa.  Ryan's response, "It was thrilling and terrifying at the same time."  Of course, he really couldn't suppress his smile.

I bet Grandpa would agree with Ryan's assessment of his first lesson!