Autism: Surviving and Thriving

Fourteen years ago my youngest 3 boys were diagnosed with autism within a 9 month span. Devastation and grieving followed. Doctors gave me little or no hope, but they didn't know me very well. I refused to believe that my boys were doomed.

My boys are now young men, adults with autism. They are thriving, but every day presents its turmoil and challenges.

My family: husband Mike, sons Ryan 23 yr, Nicholas 21 yr, and Cameron 18 yr. (Ryan and Nick have autism; Cam has recovered from autism.) Our oldest sons, Michael 34 yr and Stuart 25 yr, moved out of the house. Ryan has also moved out, and is still working towards complete independence.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Autism and Adulthood

Ryan turned 18 a few weeks ago.  With that milestone, he transitions from childhood to adulthood.  When we're children, we can't wait for that big day!!!  However, as a parent, I could wait a bit longer.

Ryan is the third child of our five boys.  Since Mike and I have had two older boys turn 18, this transition was nothing knew.  Nonetheless, a son with autism turning 18 is vastly different.  Ryan has all the rights and responsibilities of an adult, and so many questions loom?  Does he have the maturity and capability of understanding choices he makes?  Will he take the initiative to solve problems he faces?  Can he make inquiries if necessary?  Can he handle his money efficiently?  How good are his life skills?  Some of these questions can be asked of neuro-typical (NT) teens.  The answers become even more vital for adults with special needs.

The first sign that concerned me was at a family gathering.  An uncle asked Ryan if he were ready to be an adult?  Ryan answered yes.  The conversation continued in typical question and answer style, ie relatives asking questions, and Ryan answering either yes or no.  UNTIL this question was posed:  "Do you want to do something different, take on more responsibility?"  Ryan answered with a sentence, "I want the least amount of  responsibility possible."

Really?  Reality check.

Since then I have been researching what are possibilities for Ryan in all aspects of life:  living arrangements, schooling, working, finance, etc.  Not that I haven't been doing that type of research already, but it became more intense and specified. What can an adult with autism potentially do?  Not just survive, but thrive?  There are so many cases of abuse and bullying adults with autism in group homes and in the work force.  It can be scary, but like everything else, we approach it as an adventure.

So onto another journey of life!

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